very Fussy Eater - doesn't drink any milk

My 20 month old does not drink any milk. I have tried different brands, varities, flavours and am about to give up. My nanny makes some oatmeal or porridge with whole milk for breakfast and thats about it. I had to resort to force feeding her with her favorite DVD playing in the background. I tried letting her eat on her own for several months to no avail...i have tried giving her grilled veggies, meat, noodles but all she would eat is 2-3 pieces and then yells that She's all done! I have tried all that the books say, space out meals by 3-4 hours or even more. She has dinner at 7 pm and she'll go without eating anything next day until noon or so until we actually use the DVD technique and sort of force feed her. tried everything else and then resorted to this method due to her weight not improving. the only food she voluntarily eats is 4-5 chips, and 10-15 raisins each day! if she eats a fruit one day, she will not touch it for days or even weeks.

Her weight hasnt been improving either and she seems to lose some days and fluctuates between 22-23 lbs(5th percentile). Since she doesnt drink milk, not sure she will drink Pediasure. Our doctor said Pediasure might kill her appetite for solid foods too. tried Soy milk too in diff flavors; nothing works. Please help! this child has no appetite!

[Renee Radenberg]

Her weight is between the 5-10th percentile and her height is just above the 10th percentile for her age. She sounds like a very busy girl and it can be frustrating to you when she has no interest in food. Suggest she has her meals with the family together and she is given finger food (hopefully the food you eat). Does she eat yogurt or cheese? Is she does then make yogurt smoothies (yogurt, ice cream, and fruit-if accepts it-blended) in place of milk at meals for calories and protein. Relax at meals and let her eat what she wants. Try introducing new foods. Sometimes it takes 5-9 times to introduce a food that she will accept, however, if she do not want it you have to not make a fuss and let it go. Hoped this helped you.