Should I turn my heroin addicted daughter into the police?

[kej57]

I don't know wht else to do!! I found out 2 yrs ago this summer that my, now, 25 yr old daughter is a heroin addict. It began with "experimenting" with oxy, and that lead to heroin. I live in anohter state, and have flown to where she lives numerous time to try to give "tough love".. I took away the car I bought her (for college), I called the police on her because one day I found out (from my youngest daughter) taht she was driving while high/drunk...etc..etc..My daughter's father has been 100% enabling her: lieing ot the police, paying for her apartment, car, car insurance, utilities, food, anad college classes (that she never attended). I have called him numersous times, begging him to do an Intervention with me and her two sisters..he hangs up on me and refuses to confront her as "he doesn't want her to hate him". (When I turned her into the police for driving while high and drunk, the last words I have heard from her mouth was:" I hate you and wish you would die, and if you died tomorrow, I wouldn't go to your funeral" and that was August of 2009)...

I don't know what else to do!! She will only speak to her younger sister. Last Dec. (2009) she went to detox. the
"plan" was that her father will take her to rehab immediately after detox..Her enabling father did a "180" and allowed her to go back to her apartment. thus, back to heroin...

Most recently, my younger daughter told me that she had heard my heroin addicted daughter has turned to prostitution to pay for her drugs..and my addicted daughter "was" a wonderful, happy, healthy, college student who played 2 years of college volleyball!! Now she is a heroin addict and a prostitute!! HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN??

Just this last Feb. (2010) she was arrested for shoplifting. They searched her bag and found heroin. I contacted the prosecuting DA. We had a couple of great conversations. The DA was extremely helpful, and even spoke to her aobut her future after the hearing!! I sent a 3 page letter BEGGING that the court sentence her to a jail term with court ordered  detox and rehab...she only received "probation", as they had to  follow the law pertaining to "first offenders"..

My daughter needs help!! No one will help me, help her, except her younger sister.

Plus, I live in another state, which makes it more difficult trying to help "long distance".

Her father will NOT do "tough love" and, as mentioned, "covers up for her"..even when he found out she was prostituting herself out, his statement to my younger daughter was, "well..at least she is paying for her own things a little"..Her "father" should be jailed, too!!!

Should I call the police and inform them that there is illegal drug use going on in her apartment? I feel that this will be the only way to save her life!! At least in jail, she can "detox" and perhaps see "normally" and decide to go to rehab!! Right now, she is seeing the world through "heroin haze" and does not want help..

What should I do??

[liscamdave]

Wow, looks like the dad needs some help to. Well, here is the thing. What is it you are turning her in for? Doing heroin? I guess you could, but you also have no clue what her sentence would be. You want her jailed and then forced to go to detox/rehab? Correct? Well, here's the thing with addiction, most addicts need to hit a rock bottom for them to want to stop. Key words in that sentence, them to want. See, the decision has to be theirs. No matter what you, or your husband or any judge say to your daughter, the fact of the matter is she will continue down this road until she herself is ready to stop. now, maybe if she is going to go to jail that will smack some sense into her. Heroin is a demon drug. It changes everything about you. Your daughter is not in there anymore. And until she is clean and sober for a period of time, she won't be. But it can be done. I have seen worse cases turn around. So there is hope. She does need help. Has she ever said she wants to get clean, ever? My heart goes out to you, it truly does. I don't know about the turning her in thing. Since she may find out it was you and cut all ties completely. However, maybe if you do that she will know you are NOT condoning this and you won't be there to help her unless she wants the help you are able to give her. I will pray for you and your daughter and hope that things will get better for you both.

[leighanne143]

you have to do what your heart tells you.  if you think it is the only thing that will help her then by all means call.  even if they dont send her to jaill, they may mandate her to an actual program to get help.

[Rich99]

"he doesn't want her to hate him"""    He sure is enabling her if what you say is the truth.     She will not live much longer if she does not get back into detox and forced to do rehab as well.    Jail is not the answer since they do not provide the medical necessities and environment.     But maybe they will force her into a local facility.

She is shoplifting and prosituting to make money to support her deadly addiction.    This is life threatening and she needs intervention ASAP.